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Legend: Birth of a Legend
We return to Legend after the commercial break – actually, we return to Ernest. We know it isn’t Legend, because he’s sitting in his jail cell, waiting for his publishers to bail him out, instead of heroically escaping. Also, he’s playing poker with the guy in the next cell.
And cheating. That’s our Ernest!
But here comes a visitor: the deliciously named Vera Slaughter, whose 19th century sexiness marks her clearly as the Villainess. She’s a wealthy, arrogant, overdressed, overbearing land baron (or baroness). Ernest makes only a feeble attempt at a pass.
Ernest hangs adorably in the grid of the cell while Vera threatens him with a riding crop, causing minor earthquakes from fangirl squeeage. She says unkind things about the ‘dirt farmers’ he supposedly helped, and demands that he, Legend, move ‘her’ river back to where it was before he moved it.
He denies everything and waggles his fingers a lot, causing further squeeage. (There are no shirtless scenes in this show, but there’s a LOT of handporn.)
Vera leaves in a cloud of sultrykink potential anger, and Miss Sullivan, the Attractive Lady Lawyer from the first scene, turns up and bails Legend Ernest out of jail. Before he can make another pass at her, she introduces him to the ‘dirt farmers’ and tells him that they pooled their meager savings to bail him out.
Ernest cringes, from either the guilt trip or the transparent cliché. The farmers are being harassed by Vera. She’s trying to drive them off their homesteads. They expect Legend to help them, but all Ernest wants to do is get the hell out ofDodge Sheridan.
But the farmers have a Secret Weapon: an adorable little girl who’s a fan of the Legend books! She’s sure Legend must still have a touch of whumpage from his most recent novel, which is affecting his memory. Otherwise he’d remember all that stuff about moving their river, saving their water rights, championing their cause and generally being awesome.
Ernest buckles in the face of teh cute. He asks the farmers to take him to the scene of his ‘crime’.
Tomorrow’s weather forecast for Colorado: cloudy with a 75% chance of special effects. Tune in for details!
And cheating. That’s our Ernest!
But here comes a visitor: the deliciously named Vera Slaughter, whose 19th century sexiness marks her clearly as the Villainess. She’s a wealthy, arrogant, overdressed, overbearing land baron (or baroness). Ernest makes only a feeble attempt at a pass.
Ernest hangs adorably in the grid of the cell while Vera threatens him with a riding crop, causing minor earthquakes from fangirl squeeage. She says unkind things about the ‘dirt farmers’ he supposedly helped, and demands that he, Legend, move ‘her’ river back to where it was before he moved it.
He denies everything and waggles his fingers a lot, causing further squeeage. (There are no shirtless scenes in this show, but there’s a LOT of handporn.)
Vera leaves in a cloud of sultry
Ernest cringes, from either the guilt trip or the transparent cliché. The farmers are being harassed by Vera. She’s trying to drive them off their homesteads. They expect Legend to help them, but all Ernest wants to do is get the hell out of
But the farmers have a Secret Weapon: an adorable little girl who’s a fan of the Legend books! She’s sure Legend must still have a touch of whumpage from his most recent novel, which is affecting his memory. Otherwise he’d remember all that stuff about moving their river, saving their water rights, championing their cause and generally being awesome.
Ernest buckles in the face of teh cute. He asks the farmers to take him to the scene of his ‘crime’.
Tomorrow’s weather forecast for Colorado: cloudy with a 75% chance of special effects. Tune in for details!
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LOL.
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